Success In Life!

“We must look for the opportunity in every difficulty instead of being paralyzed at the thought of the difficulty in every opportunity.”
– Walter E. Cole, Korean War Hero

The above is also depicted in the Chinese characters for crisis. One of the words means opportunity - An opportunity in a crisis.

I remembered vividly when I spoke to my sister about doing a business together. She pointed out the times are bad and the economy is going downhill and people cannot afford to pay for goods and services. I think this is a very natural line of thoughts and most people tend to focus on the negative side of things.

Leaders who seize the opportunity and see beyond the crisis are able to achieve much more than the majority of the people.

Action Plan:
1) Have a goal
2) Focus on what you are doing
3) Stay firm and not be affected by what people say
4) Work at it

Are you a Great Conversationalist? Most people are not. Many choose to work with machines rather than talk to people. Are you one of them?

Honestly speaking, I was before. Now, I am still not a great conversationalist. I still have apprehension when speaking to others.

Well, I hope the following 3 skills can help improve your conversation a lot more. These are skills that Brian Tracy taught. Give them a try!

Skill No. 1 Pause Before Replying
One key to becoming a great conversationalist is to pause before replying. A short pause, of three to five seconds, is a very classy thing to do in a conversation. When you pause, you accomplish three goals simultaneously.

The Benefits of Pausing
a) First, you avoid running the risk of interrupting if the other person is just catching his or her breath before continuing.

b) Second, you show the other person that you are giving careful consideration to his or her words by not jumping in with your own comments at the earliest opportunity.

c) The third benefit of pausing is that you will actually hear the other person better. His or her words will soak into a deeper level of your mind and you will understand what he or she is saying with greater clarity. By pausing, you mark yourself as a brilliant conversationalist.

Skill No. 2 - Ask Questions
Another way to become a great conversationalist is to question for clarification. Never assume that you understand what the person is saying or trying to say. Instead, ask, “How do you mean, exactly?”

This is the most powerful question for controlling a conversation. It is almost impossible not to answer. When you ask, “How do you mean?” the other person cannot stop himself or herself from answering more extensively. You can then follow up with other open-ended questions and keep the conversation rolling along.

Skill No. 3 - Paraphrase the Speaker’s Words
The third way to become a great conversationalist is to paraphrase the speaker’s words in your own words. After you’ve nodded and smiled, you can then say, “Let me see if I’ve got this right. What you’re saying is . . .”

Demonstrate Attentiveness
By paraphrasing the speaker’s words, you demonstrate in no uncertain terms that you are genuinely paying attention and making every effort to understand his or her thoughts or feelings. And the wonderful thing is, when you practice effective listening, other people will begin to find you fascinating. They will want to be around you. They will feel relaxed and happy in your presence.

Listening Builds Trust
The reason why listening is such a powerful tool in developing the art and skill of conversation is because listening builds trust. The more you listen to another person, the more he or she trusts you and believes in you.

Listening also builds self-esteem. When you listen attentively to another person, his or her self-esteem will naturally increase.

Listening Develops Discipline
Finally, listening builds self-discipline in the listener. Because your mind can process words at 500-600 words per minute, and we can only talk at about 150 words per minute, it takes a real effort to keep your attention focused on another person’s words. If you do not practice self-discipline in conversation, your mind will wander in a hundred different directions. The more you work at paying close attention to what the other person is saying, the more self-disciplined you will become. In other words, by learning to listen well, you actually develop your own character and your own personality.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, make a habit of pausing before replying in any conversation or discussion. You will be amazed at how powerful this technique really is.

Second, continually ask, “How do you mean?” in response to anything that is not perfectly clear. This gives you even more time to listen well.

I got this message today!

You can learn a line from a win but a book from a defeat. - Paul Brown

Interesting!!!

Time flies quickly.  We have come to the time of the year when we are supposed to review what we have done well and what need improvement.  More importantly, it is an appropriate time of the year to set our directions and sights for the coming year.  Without a clear blueprint of what we want to achieve in the next 12 months, life may have no focus and it could be another year of wasted time.

I happened to read this article on Setting Your Goals By: Brian Tracy.  Let me share with you Brian Tracy’s interesting thoughts and how we could get started to set our goals and find happiness when we achieved them.

Over the years, Brian Tracy found that hundreds of top salespeople, all have one thing in common. They have taken the time to sit down and create a clear blueprint for themselves and their future lives. Even though they started the process of goal setting and personal strategic planning with some skepticism, every one of them has become a true believer.

Becoming a True Believer
Every one of them has been amazed at the incredible power of goal setting and strategic planning.   They accomplished far more than they ever believed possible in selling and they ascribe their success to the deliberate process of thinking through every aspect of their work and their lives, and then developing a detailed, written road map to get them to where they wanted to go.

In so doing, one finds happiness. 

The Definition of Happiness
Happiness has been defined as, “The progressive achievement of a worthy ideal, or goal.” When you are working progressively, step-by-step toward something that is important to you, you generate within yourself a continuous feeling of success and achievement.

You feel more positive and motivated. You feel more in control of your own life. You feel happier and more fulfilled. You feel like a winner, and you soon develop the psychological momentum that enables you to overcome obstacles and plough through adversity as you move toward achieving the goals that are most important to you.

Determine Your Values
Personal strategic planning begins with your determining what it is you believe in and stand for-your values. Your values lie at the very core of everything you are as a human being. Your values are the unifying principles and core beliefs of your personality and your character. The virtues and qualities that you stand for are what constitute the person you have become from the beginning of your life to this moment.

Your values, virtues and inner beliefs are the axle around which the wheel of your life turns. All improvement in your life begins with you clarifying your true values and then committing yourself to live consistent with them.

What is the difference between the successful and the not so successful?
Successful people are successful because they are very clear about their values. Unsuccessful people are fuzzy or unsure. Complete failures have no real values at all.

Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
Values clarification is the beginning exercise in building self-confidence, self-esteem and personal character. When you take the time to think through your fundamental values, and then commit yourself to living your life consistent with them, you feel a surge of mental strength and well-being. You feel stronger and more capable. You feel more centered in the universe and more competent of accomplishing the goals you set for yourself.

Action Exercises
Here are two simple things to do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, decide for yourself what makes you truly happy and then organize your life around it. Write down your goals and make plans to achieve them.

Second, begin with your values by deciding what it is you stand for and believe in. Commit yourself to live consistent with your inner most convictions - and you’ll never make another mistake.

It has been quite sometime after my last post ….

Well, I have been working quite hard lately and as usual, procrastination sets in.

Subsequently, when I decided to start again, I had to shift my blog to another hosting server.  It is much cheaper so I decided to do a switch.   I started to install WP again.  Alas, it was a tough struggle and I almost gave up.  My customised theme was missing and my blog was in text format and in a big mess.

Just 2 days ago, I decided to start all over again - reinstalling WordPress.  The process was painful and I forgot to do a backup of my MYSQL database.  Thank goodness, I had an earlier copy.

However, error was reported when a post was amended.  The wp-category table was not found.  Urghhhh….

I hope this post is okay. 

There are many commitments, tasks and activities that we need to complete in our daily life. A lot of times, we focus on the wrong activities and end up not achieving our objectives and goals.

I feel the skill on how to set priorities is a must for everyone.

Brian Tracy talked about:
The ABCDE Method for Setting Priorities

This is a simple process of setting short-term priorities by jotting down the many things that we need to do using a pad of paper and a pen. I find this very effective and efficient.  By doing so, I found that I did not get so stressed up and lose my focus.

Although there is never enough time to do everything, there is always enough time to do the most important things, and to stay with them until they are done right.  Stay focus on what is really important in our daily work. Separate the urgent from the important.  Plan every day in advance.

With the list of tasks, next determine the major goals or objectives we want to achieve. Use the A-B-C-D-E method to rank our tasks, You place one of those letters in the margin before each of the tasks on the list.

“A” stands for “very important;” something you must do. There can be serious negative consequences if you don’t do it.

“B” stands for “important;” something you should do. This is not as important as your ‘A’ tasks. There are only minor negative consequences if it is not completed.

“C” stands for things that are “nice to do;” but which are not as important as ‘A’ or ‘B,’ tasks. There are no negative consequences for not completing it.

“D” stands for “delegate.” You can assign this task to someone else who can do the job instead of you.

“E” stands for “eliminate, whenever possible.” You should eliminate every single activity you possibly can, to free up your time.

If we use the A-B-C-D-E method well, we can very easily sort out what is important and unimportant. This then will help us focus our time and attention on those items on our list that are most essential for you to do.

Last but not least, determine the 1 or 2 things we must do. Have the courage to say no to all diversions and distractions and focus single-mindedly on accomplishing those priorities.

Remember to do these to achieve more in your life:
Three ideas that you can use, every day, to help you set priorities and to keep you working at your best:
First, be clear about your goals and objectives so that the priorities you set are moving you in the direction of something that is of real value to you.

Second, remember to work on high-priority tasks.  It is not the amount of time that you put in overall; rather, it’s the amount of time that you spend working on high-priority tasks.

Third, understand that the most important factor in setting priorities is your ability to make wise choices. You are always free to choose to engage in one activity or another.

To our greatest health, happiness and prosperity,
Peck Ling

How do we keep our spirits high and not be affected by our surroundings and what other people say and do? As a child, we do not have this experience. Most of the time, children are oblivious to their surroundings. They are not affected by what others say or do.

During their growing years, most children are bombarded with negative thoughts in the disguise of good advice, from their caring parents and people around them. So, by the time the children become adults, all these good advice became deeply ingrained in their minds. Naturally, it becomes harder to maintain a positive mindset.

For me, I noticed that I am a naturally negative person. I would always start thinking of all the bad stuff. Eventually, the bad will out-weigh the good and nothing gets moving.

I know I need to pay attention to how I think and what I say in order to overcome this problem. I need to stay positive as I know that this will definitely be detrimental to my life and new venture if I keep on being negative in thoughts and actions.

Fortunately, I have attended some motivational courses before, where I learnt how to control and change my feelings by some simple actions and affirmation.

Brian Tracy suggested that we should take charge of those suggestive elements in our environment. We must make sure that whatever we see and listen to is consistent with the goals we want to achieve.

Brian Tracy suggests

1. Listen/Watch educational or inspirational/motivational audio or video programs.

I have been told to spend the first 15 to 30 minutes in the morning to learn from gurus and successful coaches to set the pace for the day.

I subscribe to an elearning website where there are many world class experts and coaches who discuss various topics very relevant to most of us. Incidentally, Brian Tracy highly recommends this particular eLearning website too! Besides learning, there is a great business opportunity that comes with it.

There are many other places where learning can take place. For example, in the car when you are driving, instead of listening to the radio, one can listen to audio programs. If you go on public transport, you could also listen to the audio programs as well. You can become an expert in your field by simply listening to educational audio programs as you drive or travel from place to place.

2. Take Courses That Relate To Your Field

Besides listening and watching educational programs, it is necessary to attend courses/seminars to have an in-depth knowledge in our field. One of the ways to acquire this knowledge is to attend seminars given by experts in our area of interest. We should learn from the experts, ask them questions, write them letters, read their books, read their articles and listen to people with proven track records in the area in which you want to be successful.

3. Get Around the Right People

There are many who are energy suckers (pardon me if this appears to be offensive) who would sigh and complain all day long. After prolonged periods with them, these people can condemn you to a life of underachievements, frustration and failure.

By associating only with positive, success-oriented people and winners, we can become more positive ourselves. Quote from Brian Tracy - You can’t fly with the eagles if you keep scratching with the turkeys.

4. Visualize Your Goals and Create Mental Pictures

Visualization is an extremely powerful tool. Our subconscious mind is most receptive to new programming before we fall asleep and when we get up in the morning.

These are the times we should think about and visualize our goals as realities. Our subconscious mind is only activated by affirmations and pictures that are received in the present tense. Visualize our goals vividly and see ourselves performing at our best. See the situations that we are facing, working out exactly the way we want them to.

In summary, there are two things we can do, all day long, to keep our mind and emotions focused on our goals and financial success:

First, listen to audio programs in your car and when you travel around. Continue feeding your mind with a stream of high-quality, educational, motivational material that moves you towards your goal.

Second, resolve to associate with positive, optimistic people most of the time. Get around winners and get away from negative people who criticize, condemn and complain. This can change your life as much as any other factor.

To your success,
Peck Ling

In my earlier post, I mentioned that I bought Brian Tracy’s DVD on Double Your Income and Productivity.

I have a short segment of this DVD. Click here to view it.

You can purchase the DVD here. Do a search using Brian Tracy as the keywords.

Enjoy!
Peck Ling

A Truly Remarkable Automated Business System that will blow your mind off!

If you want to learn from the best and at your own time and own pace, here is what Brian Tracy has to recommend.  Click here to view the video.

To Your Financial Freedom,
Peck Ling

Recently, I had an opportunity to join some friends  for a team building game.

During the briefing at the start of the game, the facilitator spent some time describing the game.   I thought it was a pretty straightforward game and did not pay much attention to it.   I noticed that the game facilitator did stress on certain things but I just let them pass. 

It was a hostage rescue game and the objective was to bring the hostage safely back to the facilitator.

The area was criss-crossed with  €œelectric wires € and certain areas required bridges to be built to cross them.

Team members have to assist a “blind” member to search for the hostage.   The position of the hostage could be changed during the game and the rest of the members are to guide the “blind” to reach the hostage and to guard the “bridges” so that they were not  stolen.

Our group discussed and came up with a very good strategy which would work very well up to the point when the “blind” had to venture on his own to save the hostage.

As you can predict, time was lost while trying to shout the instructions against the loud blast of the background music.   The result is we lost  the first round and had to compete in the second round.   This gave us another chance and  we managed to shorten the time considerably during the second round.   We were elated!

However, during the debrief, the facilitator revealed many ways we could have used to achieve our goal quickly.   He emphasized that the objective of the game is to save and bring the hostage to him.   This is a really big hint and we conveniently forgot this.

Well, I will not spoil the game for you by revealing everything.   What I have learnt is that we should know our objective clearly and hence know what to focus on and work on it.   Don’t just follow the instructions.   Be creative and think out of the box. 

In real life,  very often, we just stick to the rules and most often than not, do things that others do  so as  to be on the safe side.   We also make ourselves busy by doing a lot of non-impactful stuff that takes up a lot of our time and resources. In addition, we tend to work and think within the box and not out of the box.   What could be done is to get ourselves out of the picture and look at the problem from a third party’s viewpoint and to leverage on technology.

Brian Tracy said that our mind is our most precious asset. We must be continually working to increase the quality of our thinking. These two years have been a great learning time for me.   I attend courses, seminars and listen to audios and watch videos.

Travelling time is the best learning time

Whenever possible, I will listen to audio recordings or read books while travelling in the train or bus. 

Attend Seminars

I attended seminars, workshops and previews for personal and professional development to learn ideas, techniques and methods that can save me hours, days, even months of hard work and research on my own.

Learn More, Earn More

I do not believe that money drops from the sky. Even if you strike lottery, you must first place a bet.   Some hardwork and sacrifice are needed to prepare oneself for success.   Remember continuous learning is the minimum requirement for success in any field.   And you should choose your gurus wisely.

What’s  Next

Without further ado, purchase an audio program that can help you.   Check out my recommendation here.

Begin listening to it immediately.   When you are driving, instead of  listening to music in your car, resolve to turn  driving time into learning time.

Next, seek out seminars and training programs given by experts in your field.   Click here for an alternative if you have not much time or resources.   Take careful notes, and apply the best ideas that you learn immediately.

To Your Success,

Peck Ling

Check out the movie below to find out more about a Earn While You Learn Program.